Imagine scrolling through Instagram and coming across a post that moves you so deeply, you decide to alter the course of your life to help someone else achieve their dreams. That’s how Kyler was inspired to become a surrogate at just 21 years old, the minimum age recommended by the American Society of Reproductive Medicine.

She was drawn to the incredible story of a couple who had a child through surrogacy, and that planted a seed in her heart to help create a family. Because she had an easy pregnancy and delivery with her own son, she knew she could help another family have the child they had always wanted.

After delving into online research, Kyler was surprised to find how many agencies there are to match surrogates and intended parents (IPs). She relied on recommendations she received through online groups and was led to Egg Donor & Surrogate Solutions.

She credits her coordinator, Allyson, with facilitating a smooth journey from start to finish.

“My experience was amazing,” Kyler said. “Ally was always there to make sure things were running smoothly, and she was a great sounding board throughout my journey.”

The Right Match

Kyler had a clear idea of the IPs she hoped to match with, ideally a younger, laid-back couple with a good sense of humor and who shared her values about termination and the COVID-19 vaccine.

The match happened much quicker than expected, within a month of starting the process. Kyler was drawn to the IPs’ openness and honesty in their profile, their “chill” personality, and that they were dog lovers like her and her husband.

A virtual meeting between Kyler, her husband and the IPs was quickly scheduled to confirm that they were indeed an ideal match. “I was excited yet nervous to meet them,” Kyler says. “It helped having the coordinator there because I knew she would help steer the conversation, and the pressure wasn’t on me.”

The meeting was a success with both couples eager to start the journey. In describing the match with her IPs, Kyler says, “It was perfectly put together.”

A Difficult Start

While the match process was seamless, Kyler had a challenging start to the medical part of her journey. She had three embryo transfers, with the first two resulting in chemical pregnancies, which was heartbreaking for both Kyler and her IPs.

Testing revealed that Kyler had a polyp that needed to be removed. She also had an Endometrial Receptivity Analysis (ERA) completed to determine the ideal time for implantation, which delayed the process further and was inconclusive.

Ultimately perseverance won, and the third transfer was a success. Kyler’s IPs flew from their home in Texas to Utah where Kyler and her family live, so they could be present for the heartbeat confirmation. It was a special moment for both couples and set the course for a friendship that would grow over the next several months.

Building a Lasting Bond

Throughout the pregnancy, both Kyler and her husband grew close with her IPs. “He loves them as much as I do,” Kyler says.

They bonded over their shared love of dogs and enjoyed spending time together when the IPs attended medical appointments in person or when Kyler and her husband went to the IPs’ clinic in Texas.

“Video calls are fine but not as personal,” Kyler explains. “I loved it when my IPs were able to be here in person.”

One particularly special time was when the intended mom traveled to Utah to join Kyler for a birthing class. “It was an awesome experience,” Kyler shares. “I would recommend it to any IPs and surrogates who are able to do it.”

Delivery Day

The day everyone had been waiting for came in April, and a birth photographer was on hand to capture the magical moments. Kyler, who had an unmedicated delivery with her son, chose a water birth this time. The mom was able to join Kyler in the pool so she could catch her son as he came out.

“The birth photographer got it all on video,” Kyler says. “Even the nurses were crying.”

For Kyler, the moment that made it all worth it was seeing the parents hold their son for the first time. “It was everything,” she says.

Advice for Potential Surrogates

When asked about advice she has for other women who are considering surrogacy, Kyler emphasizes the importance of being your own best advocate.

“Make sure to advocate for yourself and get as much information as you can,” she says. “Do your own research and be prepared to rely on the agency coordinator more than the clinic.”

She also stresses the importance of communication with the IPs. “Don’t feel like you are bugging your IPs or talking to them too much. They are going to want to know about their baby!”

Looking Ahead

Kyler and her husband remain in close touch with the parents, talking or texting about once a week, and they are planning a visit around the holidays.

Is there possibly another surrogacy journey in Kyler’s future?

“We want to grow our family and have another baby first, then we plan to do a sibling journey for our IPs,” she says.

Our team at Egg Donor and Surrogate Solutions is honored to be part of Kyler’s surrogacy story, and we can’t wait for the next chapter!

Photography by Wild Oak Studio

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