If you hear the words psychological evaluation and immediately feel nervous, you are not alone. For many intended parents and surrogates, this step can feel intimidating. But a psychological evaluation is not about finding perfect people or looking for reasons to say no.
According to psychotherapists Leslee Murphy and Kristin Malejan of Memorial Wellness, the goal is to understand the whole person, identify strengths and resources, and help everyone feel prepared for the journey.
It Is Not a Pass or Fail Test
Psychological evaluations are not designed to judge your past. Instead, mental health professionals look at your overall emotional well-being, coping skills, support system, motivation, expectations, and ability to communicate and advocate for yourself.
Having experienced challenges in life does not automatically count against you. In fact, learning how to navigate difficult experiences can demonstrate resilience and resourcefulness.
What Happens During the Evaluation?
A surrogate’s evaluation typically includes a clinical interview and a personality assessment. If partnered, her partner may participate in the interview as well.
The conversation may cover your history, support system, expectations, coping skills, and understanding of surrogacy.
Honesty is one of the most important things you can bring to the process. You do not need to give the “right” answers or hide difficult experiences. The goal is to understand the full story.
What About Mental Health History?
A history of anxiety, depression, postpartum depression, therapy, or medication does not automatically mean someone cannot become a surrogate.
Professionals consider the circumstances, timing, treatment, current stability, coping strategies, and support system.
The focus is on the bigger picture, not simply checking a box.
And importantly, you should never stop taking prescribed medication just to pursue surrogacy. Medication decisions should always be made with your healthcare provider.
Why the Joint Session Matters
Many surrogacy journeys also include a joint psychological session with the surrogate, her partner if applicable, and the intended parents.
This gives everyone an opportunity to talk openly about expectations and boundaries before the journey begins, including:
- Communication
- Prenatal appointments
- Family involvement
- Ultrasounds and delivery
- Privacy and boundaries
- Expectations before and after birth
These conversations create a framework for the journey and can help prevent misunderstandings later.
Psychological Support Is for Everyone
Intended parents can also benefit from this process. Surrogacy may bring up grief, uncertainty, and a loss of control, especially after previous fertility struggles.
The psychological process provides an opportunity to talk through those emotions, establish expectations, and focus on the things you can control, such as communication, support, and self-care.
Think of It as Preparation, Not Judgment
Your psychological evaluation is more than another box to check. It is an opportunity to prepare for the emotional side of surrogacy.
There is no perfect person and no perfectly predictable journey. What matters is having the tools, support, communication, and resilience to navigate the unexpected.
**Take it one step at a time, be honest, ask questions, and let your support team help you along the way.
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🎧 Listen to our full interview with Leslee and Kristen on the Create A Happy Family Podcast here.
Ready to Learn More About Surrogacy?
Our team is here to help you understand the requirements, process, and what to expect along the way. Learn more about surrogacy requirements and get started with your application today.
